Toxicity in Conversation

I like to read people, and I do not mean that in a creepy way.

What I meant by my previous statement is that I like to look at other people's facial expressions and mannerisms in order to paint a picture of what they are like. It is easy for me to just look at a person and get a feel of their personality, but the best way to get to know a person is by actually speaking to them. The vast majority of people who I have spoken with in my life are pleasant people. However, I have also spoken to some people who exude negativity by the way they speak, and what they speak about, whether they realize it or not. I will offer my perspective on some of the common traits I have noticed when speaking to unappealing people.

One of the biggest things that I believe that determines how a conversation is going to go is in their tone of speech. It is not about what you say; it is how you say it. The tone in someone's voice can determine whether a conversation can turn positive or negative. People who have a negative tone of speech often do not realize how gloom-ridden they sound, but from my experiences, having a negative tone causes a lot of strife and exhaustion for me. People should not speak to you in that way and you should gently let them know how their tone makes you feel. Ask the person to listen to the way they speak to others, and hopefully the person can change their tone for the better so that more positive conversations can be had.

I have also had to listen to people who do nothing but complain about other people and things, and I feel that it creates a negative and intimidating environment for everyone that has to listen to it. It is normal for people to have bad days, but this sort of consistent, negative behaviour is usually an indicator of deeper issues with the person. The good thing is that you do not have to stay and give this person any attention. I usually try to remove myself from the conversation if I find that the atmosphere is becoming too gloomy.

Negative tones of speech and constant complaining are certainly difficult things to deal with, but the most infuriating negative quality in a person's conversation skills is their exaggerated self-importance. Some people indulge in the consumption their own pride, in the fact that they would act like they are better than you are, and that any counter-point you would make would result in belittlement from the negative person. This insatiable need to look better at the expense of the people around you is dangerous, and I believe it will only invite conflict and unhappiness. Pride is the root of all evil, and I believe that people need to be a bit more humble in their speech. Use your ears more than your mouth.

These were the kind of things that I noticed whenever I encountered generally negative people in my life. It is important for me to rid myself of the toxicity that these kind of negative people bring, and in its place, have positive people around me. This, in turn, will lead to a better quality of life for myself.